My Love Story ~

     Somehow memories in my junior high school is too hard to forget. I remember every detail of the events I have ever experienced in the junior high school. Except one, that is how I can be close with him. Everything happen naturally. I just following the flow ! wherever it took me, even I did not expect when the flow makes me feel close to him, until I love him.
     I was in nine grade in junior high school. Initially, I was know him from my friend
a few day later.. we have a conversation in the Short message (SMS). We're getting closer. Since then, I started to feel weird. I feel my heart was beating fast, and wow he loves me too! simple, we found love from the conversation.
     With him, I found my happiness. Yap, because he was my fist love. when we were courtship, I have once live conversation. and when we were meet, he didn't say a word. he just silent and smiling like a prince :p That's why I love him, he was a mysterious.
     Behind all the excitement, there's always sadness. The sadness came when I ask him to break, but he interpret differently. he think we really break up. I know his heart so sore. I could feel the pain is so deep. I know all is my fault, I could not give a clear explanation. everything I said, it happened when I was depressed. and I must said what? all has happened.
     for the 1st year from we break up, we continued study at the differently senior high school. Now, we've never met again... and for the long time he leave some massage. and from that, we have a re-conversation. and let's see some message from him...

I am minded to scream, "Do you know I'm still loving you?", But I do not have the bravery to do. so, I wish he knew the true feelings, whether he would return my feelings?

     Once upon a time, because of my ignorance, I say I love you in a foreign language ever taught by my friend that word is "Saranghae". He forced me to say that mean, but I never say what it means. I was too embarrassed to admit that I have done folly by sending that message.

this is the last message from him

     Since then till now, he never leave message for me again. I think he was bored with me. ok I just think I do punishment, called as KARMA. but I just want him to forget everything I’ve ever said. It wasn’t the real me. but he was so secretive. I wanted to know him. I want he to trust me with the things that are hurting him. I hope he can understand !      

      The worst and best part about having broken up with him is that I still love him. I still absolutely loved him. I hope that one day, we will be able to be as close as we were before he leave me. I hope that, at least, we can go back as before. Now, I regret it ! I don't know how to make him believe that i love him. the only thing that i most want is for him to know that i will always love him

"if i had one wish.. i'd wish you next to me.
i wanna give my heart, my soul, my love to you
cause everyday i'm not with you i'm missing you like crazy..
and you must know the truth.. i'm nothing without you.
it's funny how i know what people mean, boy.. when it's too good to be true.
because you give me joy, good love, good times, such happiness..
and everyday i thank the lord for you, i feel so blessed."
i'll never let you go"

     

thanks for giving me this love, for giving me your smile, for coloring my life, for makes me feel so precious, for lighting my day, for everything you have done ~ I hope you can read this post, and there's regards from my mom :D